Lori Seaborg

Worrying About Tomorrow

A friend wrote a "help!" note to an email group that I'm in with three other high school buddies. Her husband recently found out that he will be laid off on January 1st. Jobless. Like thousands of others, including my husband, who was laid off in November. Below is my response to my friend's call for help...

I'm so sorry, Neiser. That is such tough news. The unknown is always the scariest.

Things are so crazy right now, aren't they? It's insane the number of people who are losing jobs, companies closing, you name it! Good gravy.

You might find some comfort in the verses I cling to in these times -- the ones about how much more important are we than the flowers God clothes and the birds He feeds. There are so many marked up in my Bible! But sometimes I get doubtful and wonder where that leaves the people who are starving in the world or aren't clothed, and then I remind myself to let go of those doubts and just believe it because God said it. Jesus said it. (Matthew 6:25-34)

The last verse is the one that says, "Don't worry about tomorrow, for today has enough trouble of its own." And that's where you are. You're in today. Mike hasn't lost his job today; there is income today; you're all clothed and fed today. I remind myself of that often, too. It's so easy to worry instead of remembering that we're find today.

This time, even though it seems I should be worried, I'm not very often worried. That's because we've been through the really really ugly --- thousands in credit, the house on the brink of foreclosure, and our little garden center went belly-up. I cried so hard through all that, that I ran out of tears! I thought I'd go in the loo-loo bin, I'm not kidding. To make everything "worse," I got unexpectedly pregnant (#3) and he was a footling breech, so I had to have a c-section, with no insurance!

Now, of course, I can see the sunshine above those clouds. We learned to keep out of credit and got it all paid off, we saved the house from foreclosure, we focused our garden center on internet sales, the hospital let us write it all off except for $2000, and of course the baby turned out to be the very thing I needed...He was absolutely a gift straight from God for a time when I needed that baby.

I just want to say that it really is true -- it has been absolutely true in my experience -- that God will clothe us and feed us. He'll take care of us. I use to worry myself sick but when I look back on it, not a lot that I worried about ever happened. Or, if it did happen, like losing our brick-and-mortar storefront, it wasn't the horrible experience that I imagined it would be. I lost a lot of sleep over that! He may not take care of things how we think He should -- we may lose a house or a car -- but in the end, we'll see that that is okay, we're okay, we are able to make it without that anyway. He'll make sure we're okay.

Please let us know if we can help you in any way. Feel free to call or email to vent! I'm so right there with you, Sister!

Love you tons! ~ Lori

-------------------------
Lori Seaborg
http://loriseaborg.com

Taking Care of Family First

Last fall, after Hurricane Katrina came, I was overwhelmed with a
desire to help others. Our area had suffered so much after Hurricane
Ivan the year before, that I felt a great empathy for those who were
going through Katrina.

I think it is also the missionary kid in me, but I cannot ignore a
need such as that, so, with the help of others, our family was able to
help a lot of people in Mississippi who needed a "first responder"
with first aid, clothing, toiletries, snacks, Bibles, and most of all,
a listening ear.

It is good to help others.

Also in the fall, I was selected to be a part of a team of writers
and speakers for an online women's conference. It was an honor to be
chosen as one of the twelve out of almost fifty applicants (I still
cannot fathom why!), and I had grand dreams of getting my books
written and speaking with the other women as we traveled across America.

It is good to work with others.

Then, in December and January, things just got plain old rough around
here. "Things" hadn't been smooth anyway since the hurricanes - they
affected our area, too - but we held onto hope all throughout the
fall. By January (last month), the hope was all but faded and it
became a time of sheer survival. I really mean that - we were so
broken and broke that we could, out of necessity, only think of
ourselves and how to take care of this little family that God had
given us.

And that's when I remembered something I had learned long ago when I
was once overwhelmed: Even though it is good to help others, and it
is good to work with others,

It is good to take care of myself and my family first.

Our recent hard times have made me realize, over and over again, what
blessings I have been given in this little family and this house. I
am reminded that God has given me a beautiful opportunity in caring
for my husband, our four children, and our home. It is my pleasure to
serve God by taking care of this family first. When I have done all I
should for them, I know He will help me expand my ministry to include
others.

But for now, I have stopped all outside obligations and may continue
to blog and write this newsletter inconsistently. When you don't hear
from me, you can know that I am thinking about you, but I'm busy
getting all of my ducks in the right row again.

by Lori Seaborg

Oh, Great...Mommy Guilt Again

Did I just write about Mommy Guilt only 3 days ago?  I cannot believe it was me who wrote those words, because today I received it in a three-hour dose.  I do a LOT, but nothing well.  That's what I said to myself today. 

 

The 10-year-old was in pajamas until noon because he couldn't find shorts to wear; the 2-year-old is going through potty-training and had an "accident" on the kitchen floor; I tried making a nice lunch for my man but it took an hour longer than anyone's stomach planned on waiting; the new puppy was yapping loudly for attention that I didn't have time to give; our luggage was still packed from our trip 6 days ago; my bed wasn't made; the floors were a mess; there was laundry to do; all the children were being disobedient; and I didn't get my God time in.

 

So I finally crumbled and said to dh, "I do so many things and I want to be perfect at them all. But I don't do anything well." 

 

Do you ever feel like that?  Overwhelmed with all that you're doing, and even more overwhelmed with all that needs to be done. Finally, you reach a crying point (or a yelling point).  You feel like a failure.  So Satan gets your ear.  He tells you that you're a failure and that you're a really bad mom. 

 

Do you really think you are? 

 

I know that you're not. 

 

God knows that you're not. 

(Originally published on my 2005-2008 Keeping the Home blog)

Who Are We Gals? Why, We're the Heart of the Home!

"Your wife shall be like a fruitful vine in the very heart of your house." Psalm 128:3

 

She - the wife - who is the heart of the house, making it a home, she is the reward to a man who fears the Lord!  (Enough children to fill a table is also part of the reward, if you read on.  I'm sure your husband is glad to know that one.)

 

It warms my heart to know:

 

1.  I am part of my man's reward.
2.  God considers me to be the "very heart" of the home.
3.  My place - the point of my focus - is to be at home.

 

A "fruitful vine" is a healthy vine; one that is producing fruit.  That much is obvious!  What does it take to be a fruitful vine?  Here are some ideas:

• The fruitful vine requires water and nutrition to survive.  You also require water and nutrition.  Take care of yourself!  Know your boiling point and don't go there.  Take breaks when you need them.  You can't put an oxygen mask on someone else unless you have one on your mouth first. 
  

• A fruitful vine is one that weathers storms.  If the environment was never rough, the vine would not be as strong.  You weather life's storms.  It's the smallest storms that get the worst of me.  Some days just don't go right.  The baby spills the left-on-the-table cereal bowl and while you are cleaning it up, the nine-year-old slacker sneaks away from his schoolwork and turns on the X-Box, just because you're not looking (my children are Perfect, of course, so they'd never do this.  I just have this much detail because....well, ok, I admit it's from experience).  Let the storm come; don't fight it.  During the storm, pray (here is where we differ from vines.  I don't think they pray).
  

• A fruitful vine...well, bears fruit!  We can look to the Bible for what God views as fruit:  "But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control" Galatians 5:22-23  That last one particularly bites me; I wish I could just leave it out of the list!  Which "fruit" are you struggling with?  Notice that the list of fruits do not include nagging, criticism, yelling (too bad!), and impatience. 

Are you being the kind of gal who makes a good reward?  Is your husband really thanking God for this present that was given to him, or is he saying, "Uh, no, thanks!"?

(This article was originally published on my 2005-2008 Keeping the Home blog)

A Mother's Calling

One of my favorite blog posts includes this quote from Martin Luther, which speaks volumes to me as a mother:

Our natural reason looks at marriage and turns up its nose and says, “Alas! Must I rock the baby? Wash its diapers? Make its bed? Smell its stench? Stay at nights with it? Take care of it when it cries? Heal its rashes and sores? And on top of that care for my spouse, provide labor at my trade, take care of this and take care of that? Do this and do that? And endure this and endure that? Why should I make such a prisoner of myself?”

What then does Christian faith say to this? It opens its eyes, looks upon all these insignificant, distasteful and despised duties in the spirit, and is aware that they are all adorned with divine approval as with the costliest gold and jewels.

Its says, “O God, I confess I am not worthy to rock that little babe or wash its diapers, or to be entrusted with the care of a child and [my spouse]. How is it that I without any merit have come to this distinction of being certain that I am serving thy creature and thy most precious will? Oh, how gladly will I do so. Though the duty should be even more insignificant and despised, neither frost nor heat, neither drudgery nor labor will distress me for I am certain that it is thus pleasing in thy sight.”

~ You can read Luther's entire essay, "The Estate of Marriage," here

A Rainy Day

It's been a lovely day...my kind of day. It has rained non-stop, and I mean that literally, all day long.

Sometimes it's nice to have a little sniffle so you have an excuse to lay around for a while. Today, I don't have a sniffle, but I do have rain. It's nice to know that today my children are staying clean and I'm not going to be overwhelmed with an extra load of sandy, wet, muddy clothes from them being outside. It's been nice just to spend time indoors as a family.

We spent the morning reading, playing on the computer, playing on the XBox (it's Spring Break, you know), and doing as few chores as possible.

Tim and the baby had a delicious nap this afternoon with the bedroom's outside door open and the window cracked. A breeze blew in and the rain fell. They slept for ages like that.

While they were sleeping, I taught our 7yo daughter how to make "Yarn Babies." Midway, our 9yo son became interested in our project and changed some of the instructions to create "Yarn Ninjas" out of black yarn. Like Pioneer children, our kids were busy for hours creating and playing with their simple yarn dolls. (Tomorrow our son wants me to buy green yarn to create "Yarn Army Guys" complete with a grey-yarn gun).

After I taught the kids how to make the yarn babies, I worked on making homemade pretzels, something I used to do often in high school but don't take the time to do anymore.

We finished the evening with Pizza, Popcorn, and Pretzels (we often eat "P" foods with our pizza, so we can call it a P-p-p-party). Before the baby's bedtime, we watched "The Secret Garden" together - a movie I never tire of seeing.

Thank God for rainy days!

My Van, Part II

(Read here for Part I of my van story)

"He works hard to give her all he thinks she wants." (Kenny Rogers)

Last night, my man came back from Ohio with the van that we found on eBay to replace our wrecked one. I cannot believe how loved I am by these two fellows of mine - my man and my God.

As Kenny Rogers sang the words above, we drove around the country block. The kids were beyond loud in the back seats - so excited after spending weeks in our tiny Nissan Sentra.

But my thoughts were on the fitting words of Kenny's song, the three red roses on my lap, and how my little hand fits so well into my man's great big one.

And you know what?

You who posted or told me that God would give us something even better in return for what had been taken away - you were right. This newer van has all that I loved about the other van, but even more and even better.

When God and my man get together and spoil this gal of theirs -- oh, boy, am I ever lovin' life then!

"The Lord gives and the Lord takes away. Blessed be the name of the Lord." - Job

(Originally published on my 2005-2008 Keeping the Home blog)

Today I Am...

Ordering...50 baby chickens from McMurray Hatchery (up 25 from my idea last week -- still don't tell my man!)

Screaming...inwardly at the computer because I can't figure out how to put a photo next to my profile on this blog

Listening...to our baby girl make her sweet baby noises while playing in the room next to the one I'm in.

Waiting ...another 12 days or so to see if our bunnies really do "breed like rabbits"

Hoping...(all of us except my man) that we have baby bunnies for Easter to go along with our 50 chicks

Liking...my man a lot better now that I am writing about all the animals he is being so patient to let me have

Looking...at the Dead Sea Scrolls in Mobile, Alabama yesterday afternoon. Wow! Israel has never let them out of their country before and we are so honored.

Breathing...or not. A minute ago, I tried to see if I would really pass out if I didn't have a mouth and had to use my congested nose to breathe. Experiment failed, but just barely.

Sorting...through piles of children's clothes to store or give away. I cannot keep up with it!

Writing...a newsletter

Making...something that takes no imagination for dinner. I do NOT feel well! What's on TV tonight?

(Originally published on my 2005-2008 Keeping the Home blog)

My Ex-Van

God gives and God takes away. I know that.

Still, it hurt today when He allowed my van to be taken from me. The insurance guy called and said it was totalled in an accident last week. I learned that "totalled" doesn't always mean it's a horrible accident. This accident was just a little one, nobody else was involved, nobody was hurt...except for my lovely little van.

I felt silly crying over a hunk of metal, leather, and plastic. I had to run away from my man so he wouldn't see how disappointed I was.

He'd been the one who had the accident. He felt terrible that he had been driving my vehicle and not his own. I didn't want to burden him with more guilt.

When he caught up with me and held me in his arms, I was embarrassed to hear myself sob.  My man said, "We'll get another one. It's going to work out."

I nodded my head against his chest. "I know that," I said, "Give me just 10 minutes to be sad."

"Okay, but only 10," he said with a smile.

It's just that I'm going to miss it.

It was what I prayed to have for years.

Before we had the van, for over a year and a half we owned only one vehicle - a Nissan Sentra. Let me tell you, it is possible to get a family of six into a tiny little Sentra, but it is not safe to do so. There are only 5 seatbelts! I stayed home with the children any time my man had the car. Since he commuted an hour each way to work, I stayed home a lot. Staying home was not always convenient, but it helped us save up money for our future van.

The kids (ages 6, 4, 2 and baby) would pray with me every night: "Jesus, please give us a van and please give us a home in the country." Then we would thank Him for all that He had already given us: our one little car and our little house in town.

One day, my man, a motorcycle-and-truck kind of guy, decided we had enough money saved and agreed that we could start looking for a van. Right away, we found just the right one at a great price.

God had taken His sweet time in answering my prayers then, but He did answer them!

I know He'll do so again.   Give me just 10 minutes to be sad.

(Originally published on my 2004-05 Keeping the Home blog)

Today I Am...

Driving...a rental car. Our van was wrecked last week, but it was a single-car accident and - thank God! - my man was perfectly fine. The van slipped off the road in a heavy rainstorm, landing in a ditch with an unluckily-placed pipe that smashed up the underside. C'est la vie!

Reading...Laine's Letters, a site written by a wife & mom in California who has a heart for God like none I've read, and shares yummy recipes to boot!

Loving...my time with my brother, Stephen, who is moving to Chile in a week. We enjoyed a coffee-and-bookshop kind of day in my artsy-writerly town.

Drooling...over a bit of toffee from Punta Clara Kitchen. There is no doubt that the angels will serve toffee in Heaven!

Chatting... about chunky yarn and bamboo knitting needles with the shop owner of a tiny yarn shop in our tiny town.

Collecting...19 eggs while the 20th was being laid. Anyone want some?

Laughing...at my man's reaction when I emerge from the car with a girl bunny. Our boy bunny needed a wife and I simply could not resist her black spots on white fur.

Grinning...when he asks me if I realize that we are now going to have baby bunnies all over the place.

Ordering...28 baby chicks from Murray McMurray. Don't tell my man, okay? :)

(Originally published on my 2004-05 Keeping the Home blog)

On (Not) Worrying About Money

Sunday's Extreme Makeover Home Edition was for a family whose man of the house had lost his job earlier in the year. As a result of the job loss, the family was homeless and living in a shelter when the show rescued them. I saw tears in my man's eyes and felt them in mine several times during the 2 hour episode.

It was so recent that we were experiencing the pain of his job loss. Like almost all job terminations, ours was an unexpected, cruel blow.

In the middle of the episode, my man , who was holding the baby and stroking her hair, said with a catch in his voice, "I hope I can always take care of all of you."

I know he will, because I know that God will.

This is God's promise for us:

"And He said to His disciples, "For this reason I say to you, do not worry about {your} life, {as to} what you will eat; nor for your body, {as to} what you will put on.

For life is more than food, and the body more than clothing.

Consider the ravens, for they neither sow nor reap; they have no storeroom nor barn, and {yet} God feeds them; how much more valuable you are than the birds!

And which of you by worrying can add a {single} hour to his life's span?

If then you cannot do even a very little thing, why do you worry about other matters?

Consider the lilies, how they grow: they neither toil nor spin; but I tell you, not even Solomon in all his glory clothed himself like one of these.

But if God so clothes the grass in the field, which is {alive} today and tomorrow is thrown into the furnace, how much more {will He clothe} you? You men of little faith!

And do not seek what you will eat and what you will drink, and do not keep worrying.

For all these things the nations of the world eagerly seek; but your Father knows that you need these things.

But seek His kingdom, and these things will be added to you." (Luke 12:22-31)

Happy Thanksgiving Under a Full Moon

I've always wanted to garden under the full moonlight.

I've never gardening under the full moonlight because I think the neighbors might hear the scritch-scratch of my shovel and imagine I was burying a dead person. If someone ever came up missing in our county, I bet they'd mention the strange noises coming from my yard in the middle of the night.

Since gardening was out, I asked my man if he would go on a walk to the river with me. I expected a "What?!" but he surprised me with a "K."

It was just after midnight on Thanksgiving Day and the trees were swaying with the strong breezes coming in from the West. The river is flowing loudly tonight. Normally it is silent, but tonight it has flooded over the banks by just a couple of feet. It makes a gurgling sound as the water pushes its way through the fallen cedars and pines that Hurricane Ivan left in the middle of the river. 

We walked, hand in hand .... well, then hand pulling hand because he was going too fast in his sneakers for my bare feet...then hand letting go of hand...Anyway, we walked in the moonlight together, watching the river flow past us so swiftly, hearing animals in the woods, feeling wet sand between my toes.

I was reminded of the Creator, the One who has given us all reason for Thanksgiving. When we walked back up the yard, we visited the chickens. Princess, the rooster who we thought was a hen, did his side-of-the-head stare at us. I poked my finger through the chicken wire to touch a sleeping hens feathers.

Under the moon, with the stars above and the white clouds flowing swiftly across them, with the breeze blowing cool air and with the river gurgling and the hens shifting their weight on the roost, I thought of our Creator.

"The Heavens declare the glory of God and the firmament showeth His handiwork. Day unto day uttereth speach and night unto night uttereth knowledge. There is no speech nor language where His voice is not heard."

We can hear Him and see Him in creation. If you are ever wondering where God is, get outside and be in the midst of his creation. THAT is the Great Cathedral. You will find Him there.

For God's creation of nature, and for His creation of mankind...I am thankful this Thanksgiving.

(Originally published on my 2004-05 Keeping the Home blog)